Changed
by starlightdreamer052000
Summary: Hermione is back at hogwarts but she is a changed Girl. Story contain Self Harm issues HG/SS
1. Chapter 1

A/N; I don't own Harry potter

A/N; I don't own Harry potter . I haven't written fanfiction in a long time due to mental health issues and I recently found out in partially dyslexic and dyspraxia so please bear with me.

Warning this fic deals with Self Harm

Chapter 1 Back again:

Hermione Granger looked up at the castle in front of her. The war ended two years ago Hogwarts was finally reopening and Hermione was going to sit her NEWTS. There was one small problem Hermione granger was no longer a lost little girl she had once been. She had seen things done things in the war which she was not proud of . She step out into kings cross. "Hermione over her" Ron was waving to her across the station near the entrance to platform 9 and three quarters. Next to him stood Harry and Ginny. Hermione took a last breathe and walked over to her friends. "hey guys are you ready for this."

Severus Snape looked out of the window onto the ground of Hogwarts and once again cursed his luck. He should of died in the final battle. but he made that stupid bet he made with Lucius Malfoy, when he was young. "of course I can put a stopper in death Lucius if I was to drink this potion I cant die till Im at lease 150 years old" Severus once again cursed his stupid youth and was pulled out of his thoughts by: "Severus the meeting about to start I would appreciate you joining us," "Of course Mivera."

The Journey to Hogwarts was rather uneventful having Harry and Ginny as head boy and girl meant Ron, Hermione, Neville, Luna all shared the Heads carriage so they didn't have to put up with the large masses of Hogwarts student trying to get a glimpse at the order of Merlin first class. The war had changed then but when they where all together nobody really saw a difference in them. Yet Hermione did. Hermione sat and said nothing when they all talked or played exploding snap. If anyone asked a question she would answer "I need to read this Newts aren't far away you know. Nobody saw past that fake smile or interest in learning nobody saw how fake Hermione felt and nobody saw the scars she hid.

The train pulled up and as the entire students got out of the carriages the Thestrals could been see by all, as after all everybody lost somebody in the final battle. "quick over here I've got us a carriage." "thanks Neville" Hermione sat by Neville and he blushed. " So what do you think is going to happen at the feast"

Severus was sitting at the teachers table waiting for all the student to arrive another year with Potter and his pals. Was the only thing going through Snape head was: the realisation that Potter knew about Lilly. He knew Potter got his name saved and knew once again that he would never truly be free his old two master where dead but as long as Potter was alive he still was a slave after all he owed potter a wizards debt so large it would never be repaid.

The feast started and the sorting had begun

Welcome to Hogwarts young and old

The time of trouble has past

So let the truth be told

In times of darkness

When there seems no light

Look to someone like you

To help you through that dark night

Now which house to place you I can see

But when you need a true friend

Don't only rely on thine house

"I think the hats truly lost it." "Ron shh." Hermione looked up at the hat was he talking to her. Yes the war was won but the darkness was something she felt know something in which she felt so strong. "Herm I was only saying." "you was only saying what Ronald only Gryfindor won the battle did they" Ginny Luna and Neville rolled there eyes at the argument. They all though, some things would never change. Harry however was looking at Severus he saw him in a new light now but the professor seemed to have the same loathing on his face and no matter what Harry knew that look still scared him.

Severus looked at the student but listened to the song how could someone be like me he though. As Severus looked around he saw Potter and put on his usal glare. Then I noticed something different about Granger. The girl was wearing a glamour he couldn't tell which but he noticed something.

That night Hermione was glad to get to her room. All older student were allowed to have there own rooms away from the dorms. It was only fair since they where all over age and most had there own lives after all Harry and Ginny where married and so should be able to live together. Hermione hastily unpacked till she got to it. There at the bottom of her bag The razor blade shone to her. She just sat there looking at it. Hermione look of the glamour she had been wearing all day the cuts and scars where visible across her arms and legs. Revulsion ran through her for a moment then the calm. I deserve this she thinks and pick up the blade.


	2. Chapter 2

Note: This came to me minutes ago, and I had to write it

Don't own Hp Don't sue.

Please forgive the spelling im dyslexic

If you like please review.

Chapter 2

Severus Snape watched as the seventh year entered his class room thinking of how it was just his luck he spent another year with the golden trio. "settle down do not for one moment that I will tolerate your childish behaviour the war may be over but my rules still apply. Now who can tell me what this potion is." The class was silent even after the war Severus Snape could still be a scary man. Hermione looked at the potion and knew straight away it was the last potion in the world she wanted to see. "Miss granger surely the Gryfindor know it all isn't stumped by this little potion."

Hermione stared at Snape there was something in his eyes that she notice reflected in hers. Did he know? Hermione quickly answered the question " It's the revelations potions sir used in uncovering physical truths usually administered before marriage to see if a witch or wizard is hiding there true physical self used mainly in pure blood families to make sure there suitor is actually as physically pleasing as possible."

Severus saw that look in her eyes. The fear. "5 points from gryfinddor miss Granger if you knew the answer you should have put your hand up." "But that not fair sir." "10 points Mr Weasley I have never been known to be fair… the instructions are on the board now get to work. Be careful at the last stage the ingredient are highly volatile. " The class hurried to the stock room and started there project. Severus stared at Hermione there was something in her which he could not figure out. Something was attracting him to this girl and that something wasn't good.

"Hermione how'd you get it to go white." Ron asked " Stir Counter clockwise Ronald " Ron turned to Harry " Something's never change. I was only asking and I get my head bit off" "Indeed something's never change 5 points Mr Weasly Mr Potter" BANG smoke irrupted from Hermiones cauldron. "Everybody out." The class ran out of the dungeons except for Hermione and Snape. "Finniate" the smoke evaporate. Hermione was on the floor looking not at the potion but at her arms. The potion had undone the concealment charm. "Miss granger I think we'd best get you to the hospital wing." Hermione looked up in to Snape's eyes her own glisting with tears, yet seeming so hollow. "Please don't. don't tell anyone."

Severus looked at Hermione he knew that look, he saw the scars. The girl he once saw as an annoying student now looked the mirror image of himself. He knew from that moment he would watch out for her. He would not let her get as lost as he did. He Severus Snape would make sure of it. "very well Miss Granger but there will be some rules if I am to keep this secret do I make myself clear." Hermione looked up "Sir". "You will meet with me once a week this may change depending on the what happened In these meeting. To everyone else you will say that you are my apprentice I will right the paperwork up and with your intelligence nobody would question it."

Hermione was in shock Severus Snape was going to keep her secret. He didn't condemn her when he saw the scars. He didn't yell or tell her how stupid a child she was on the contrary in fact for Snape he was treating her like an equal. "Wont people notice when I don't do the work." "Oh Miss Granger you will of course be doing apprentices work for year I've needed someone to mark dundhead essays and you are just the young woman for the job." "but you have always refused to have apprentices in fact when I applied you declined." "I declined because you already have the skills needed to be an approtiate potions mistress and found I had nothing to teach you, that you wouldn't learn from anyone else. However I have come to the conclusion that I may be able to help so therefore have changed My mind. As for other apprentices there has been none with your talent so they where all easy to decline."

The two was quiet for a long time. Finally Hermione looked into Snapes eyes. "Why are you doing this." Severus looked at Hermione and wondered himself, but ended up saying. "because I don't want to see you hurt like me. Miss granger. I know those scars you carry are not because of the war or your friends they are scars you have caused yourself and I know better than most about those. Don't get me wrong I am not a nice man nor do I try to be. But the scars will one day engulf you miss granger. I cant stop that happening only you can do that." Then Snape left

Ok what did you think did I reveal the truth to soon. R and R


	3. Chapter 3

Sooo sorry i never completed this story life kind of got in the way but i've got some time to kill so am going to rectify that over then next few week as i've got time on my hands. Again i don't own harry potter and so don't sue me

Snape wondered what he had just done. He never expected her to make a mistake in a potion that when it exploded he was so shocked he didn't really register her scars. He offered her an apprenticeship on a whim and was now regretting that decision. All that went through his head was how could he think of helping her when he couldn't help himself.

Hermione sat in her room quill in hand hanging over parchment that had remained blank for over half an hour. So many thoughts where running through her head.

**How could she have been so stupid?**

**He knows **

**He'll tell**

**People will find out**

**An apprenticeship is such an honour why her.**

"Grrr" finally the thoughts had been enough Hermione threw her quill down and began to pace the room. Hermione went to her bed and pulled out a box from underneath the next thing she felt was release. Cool blood poured down her leg the colour mesmorised her she lay down and went to sleep.

Snape however could find no sleep that night, finally after resulting to a substantial amount of fire whisky he had a plan. He would work the girl so she didn't have time to cut or anything else. Well that was what he wished for. There was that nagging thought one day he would have to confront her on what she was doing and boy did he not like that thought.

The next morning Hermione was having breakfast in the great hall "get a room god I really don't need to see my sister do that" "its a free country Ron, and where all adults" "here we go again Hermione can you calm Ron down please" "Sorry Harry you got yourself into this you can get yourself out." Just then Snape walked up behind them "Miss granger I expect to see you tonight at 7 o clock there is much paperwork to be filled out and a few task to be completed" Hermione had jumped at the sound of his voice and had forgotten that she hadn't told the others about the apprenticeship "yes of course professor." "and make sure you have eaten properly before you come it will be a long night." Snape strode of mentally cursing himself for his last comment. "whoa almost sounded like he cared there and what's this about an apprenticeship.

Lessons went by so slowly Hermione barely managed to focus in history of magic professor binns had to ask her a question twice. The other however didn't see anything wrong they where to consumed by daily life they failed to see their friend was struggling.

7 o clock "come in miss granger" Hermione walked into the class room though part of her wanted to run what was going to happen to her was he going to use these classes to punish her for what she had done. "now we have a lot to get on with but first I need to make sure you know what your getting yourself into. The hours will be long and I am not a pleasant man to work with but the rewards are that your secret will be kept. Do you agree to these terms." "what will happen if I don't agree" "then you are free to leave but i will be forced to inform the headmistress of your extra curricula activities. For your own safety someone need to help you." "can you" "can i what." "help" "unfortunately miss Granger the only one who can ultimately help stop what you are doing to yourself is you however i will be here if you need me or possibly when one day you may be able to trust me enough to help. Now for today we will begin on healing draught for madam pomfrey as her medical supplies are running low.


	4. Chapter 4

AN: Would like to thank people who's added this story to fav please review let me know what you think.

Hermione finished just before midnight and whilst walking up to her room she bumped into harry Ron and Neville coming back from the three broomsticks. "are you guys drunk." "mione you missed a good night, Neville got lucky with the new bar maid" Neville blushed "you guys are nuts. I think you should set a better example just because we don't have curfew we should respect the rules of Hogwarts." "geez mione lighten up. It's just a night out you could do with a little time out once in again instead of being such a swat sometimes." "thanks a lot Ronald but I have other things to do than getting drunk." With that Hermione stormed off to her room. "girls" Ron muttered and Harry slapped him round the head.

Hermione went to her room normally the boys being drunk would of frustrated her. She couldn't understand why alcohol helps the few times she had got drunk herself always ended in large amount of regret and self loathing how could the boys find anything happy in it . There was something else on her mind so she let the incident slide. Snape was true to his word, the evening had been long and some of the potions she could of done in her sleep but he was a harsh task master but he was also fair. The night had made her wonder why he was helping her. He only mentioned her cutting at the start of the night, there was no criticism of what she was doing no pleading for her to stop just simple acknowledgement that how she was coping for the first time in a long time she went to sleep wondering on a person who has darker thoughts than herself.

Snape was happy with the work that had got produced that evening maybe the girl would be able to help get medial task done a lot quicker and who knows maybe in time be able to help with bigger task. There was of course the issue he knew one day he would have to deal with. How was a man who spent so many years in shadow and loneliness supposed to help someone heading down that road and if he could help someone else why couldn't he help himself.

Classes went on for normal the next few days Hermione started to focus on classes a little more but at night the thoughts of past caught up with her. Hermione couldn't hide from herself the images of war where etched in her mind her only release was the times she hurt herself but the more cuts she would do the less relief they gave small scratches which once gave release now caused more aggravation.

AN: just to clear a few things up Harry and Ginny are head boy and girl but all those who fought in the war have special privileges such as no curfew and own rooms


End file.
